The Blotted Escutcheon and the Soiled Ermine

A blotted escutcheon, rising to a question of privilege, stated:

"Mr. Speaker, I wish to hurl back an allegation and explain that the spots upon me are the natural markings of one who is a direct descendant of the sun and a spotted fawn. They are not the result of any accident of character, but are inherent in the divine order and constitution of things."

When the blotted escutcheon had resumed his seat, a soiled ermine rose and said:

"Mr. Speaker, I have listened with profound attention and complete approval to the explanation of the honorable member, and I wish to offer a few remarks on my own behalf. I, too, have been foully calumniated by our ancient enemy, the Infamous Falsehood. I would like to point out that I am made of the fur of the *Mustela maculata*, which is dirty from birth."