A Revivalist Revived

A revivalist who had fallen dead in the pulpit due to his fervent religious fervor was astonished to awaken in Hades. Confused and eager to return to the land of the living, he promptly summoned the Adversary of Souls and demanded his freedom. He explained that he was entirely orthodox and had always led a pious and holy life.

"That is all very true," replied the Adversary, "but you taught by example that a verb should not agree with its subject in person and number. The Good Book says that contention is worse than a dinner of herbs. You also attempted to liberate the objective case from its bondage to the preposition, and it is written that servants should obey their masters. Therefore, you must remain right here."